Happy Endings: The Tales of a Meaty-Breasted Zilch Audiobook (Free)

BEST HEARD ON AN EMPTY STOMACH

Jim Norton is certainly a pervert in the truest feeling of the term. The physical equivalent of a high slug, he will pay top dollar for massages with happy endings, and it is fascinated with shitty sitcoms and extra fat girls. He’s also, at times, racially offensive and morally repugnant. He spares no-one in his humor — least of all himself.

Now, in this outrageous, blisteringly funny assortment of essays, Norton tackles the topics that are near and dear to his heart: From general public events like the famous Voyeur Bus occurrence over the Opie and Anthony Present, which culminated in every involved being taken to jail, or seeking a hug from his childhood idol Gene Simmons, to deeply private moments, including a teenage Jim’s humiliating poetry-writing attempts while in rehab, his inexpensive intimate encounter with an unwashed MILF (Monolith Let me Forget), and becoming captured masturbating in the backseat while his friend was traveling. His tales are organic, searingly honest within their attention to fine detail, and most of all, hilarious.